I'd like to get into consentual non-consent, as it's called. The phrase makes my brain dizzy, but seems to be accurate. It should be interesting as a sub, as I don't have to worry about going too far or being labelled a rapist/abuser. I don't know what specific scene could best express c n-c for me... maybe B has some ideas.
Long-term bondage &/or cagery. Seems to go against the concept of being a part-time sub... but I don't need to get everything I'm looking for from B. Naja seems to understand my whole closet fetish.
I think B knows this part already... I want to be or become a tough sub who can take anything she can dish out. I want to be rightfully prideful in my accomplishments.
My goals towards becoming a good master seem irrelivant and vague right now. Well, not irrelivant... I technically have a slave... even if my situation with her does not even vaguely match my concept of a M/s relationship. I wish R would write.
I had other goals, but I dreampt them up in half-sleep, and now that I'm awake I can't remember.
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